Summer is finally here, thanks Climate Change!

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The Climate Change Hoax

Climate change is the biggest hoax ever perpetuated upon the general public.  It is nothing more than a system designed by those in power to take money out of the general public’s pocket.  They want to tax us more with the stipulation that “they” can fix the weather.  In the past we called these people frauds, hucksters, or charlatans and they usually were ran out of town after they did not bring rain (or sun) to any weather challenged area.  I will go over their arguments as I see them and we can write them off, as they should be.

Climate change and Al Gore.

There is not much to say about Al Gore than hasn’t already been said.  He is the main mouthpiece for Climate Change legislation (and I am capitalizing ‘Climate Change‘ because is the same as any other religion).  He produced a film about Climate Change, he give speeches year round about Climate Change and he has gotten very, very rich off of Climate Change.  Follow the money.

Al Gore got extremely rich talking about Climate Change.  He is able to afford a 10,000 square foot mansion that uses more energy in one month than most Americans use in a year.  He flies in big jet planes and when he speaks there is usually a line of SUV limos waiting to take him and his entourage anywhere they want to go.  He says it is OK, though, because he pays carbon offsets.

He set up carbon exchanges and makes money off of people buying carbon offsets.  This is a scan where gullible people “buy” carbon offset credits to feel good about themselves if they have to fly and use oil or carbon product.  Al Gore gets a cut of this nice little pie.

Al Gore also created a TV network called Current TV.  He created it, built it, and then sold it for a 500 million dollars to Al Jazeera, a News Network bought and paid for by big oil.  To top it off he sold it before the new tax rates went into effect, all the while lecturing the rest of us that it is our duty to pay more taxes.

There is something wrong when a man lives his lifestyle and tells you and me we need to reduce our carbon foot print.

Climate Change and Science

What is the weather supposed to be?  Is every day of every year supposed to be the same as the same day the previous year?  Have you ever paid attention to the weather person on TV?  They cannot predict the weather with any accuracy more than 24 hours into the future, yet we are supposed to believe that we can predict what the weather will be like 10, 50 or 100 years in the future?  That is not science, it is prognostication.

When I was growing up we were told that an ice age was coming.  There was a famous cover of Newsweek proclaiming this.  Thirty years pass and we are told there is “global warming” coming and we are all going to overheat.  When people looked around and saw longer and colder winters, more snow, cooler temperatures, they did not buy it so the wording was changed to Climate Change.  This is the banner for which the left fights now.

Do you know in the 1500′s the climate changed and got warmer as to where they could grow grapes in England?  There were no factories, there were no cars, there was no human carbon footprint.  It was mother nature and the natural cycles that did this, it was activity of the sun, it was out of human control, much as it is today.  Throughout history there has been warming and cooling, and it is natural.

In Galileo’s time he was persecuted because he had the audacity to proclaim that the earth revolved around the sun.  He made this announcement after making observations.  The Catholic Church did not like this, because according to thinking at the time the earth was the center of the universe.  Science was overridden.

Now we have climate scientists who have seen that we are in a cooling period since 1998.  This does not fit into their computer models and they are stumped.  Instead of making observations and extrapolating outcomes, they take outcomes and try to make the science fit their theories.  Much like Galileo was told to do.    There have been emails uncovered with these scientists that PROVE that they lied about global warming and they changed their data to reflect this.  Yet the gullible still believe.

Scientists get grants from the government to do work.  If the government likes the answers they are getting (meaning the government can tax us more and take away more of our liberties) then they get more money.  So the scientist write computer programs that will demonstrate global warming and Climate Change.  They are merely guesses, and nothing more.  Nothing more.  Garbage in and garbage out.

The process feeds on itself and the more money they get the more they scream global warming and the more we lose our liberties.  It is time for the nonsense to end.

 

Life is Like High School

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Life is like High School

The older I get the more I realize that all of life is like high school.  You have no idea how much that disappoints me.  When you are trying to get out of high school when you are young, you dream of getting away from all the petty bullshit and all of the games that are played;  but you know what?  You never get away.  High school is with you throughout every aspect of your life and in the United States you will never escape it.

Remember going to high school and trying to navigate all the cliques, all the bull shit, and trying to be liked by everyone else around you?  It is the same way in your grown up life.  With the advent of Facebook you can now see how people act and behave and you see the things they put up with to get along, to not make waves, and to be liked.  What caused the writing of this article?  I had someone IM me on Facebook and tell me that she removed a post from my high school page because it was political, and as an aside she said she did not like my feeds because she did not like what I wrote about politics.  Excuse me?  I told her if she did not like it to remove me as a friend and she would get no more feeds from me and that is where it stands now.

High School and Politics

Nothing, and I mean absolutely nothing, highlights the high school phenomenon more than the election of Barack Obama.  Never has a man been elected without any vetting by the press or his own political party.  He is a ghost.  His past is muddled and we are not allowed to ask questions about it, his stories do not jibe (some would call them stories, I call them lies), he will not let anyone see his school transcripts and the birth certificate he submitted as proof has been shown to be a fraud put together by a novice PDF creator.  He was elected because he was black and because he could read words off of a teleprompter.  He had no experience running anything, let alone a country, yet he was elected nonetheless.  The blacks voted for him with a 98% rate, which means most of them voted for him because of the color of his skin.  It makes me utterly sad.

If you are on the right, like I am, you notice this happens all over the place.  News organizations fellate this president because they want to be liked.  The news shows do not get interviews with the guy, mainly because he is to busy appearing on The View (where he is trying to be liked), to busy hanging out with his holiday buddies (trying to be liked) and to busy playing golf (hey, who doesn’t like golf?)  When you are on the right the schools are against you, the press is against you, movies and video games are against you, all because the people running these institutions was to be liked.

Why being liked is not the road to travel, or get off the high school treadmill

The education industry in our country stinks.  It is absolutely rotten.  In Detroit only 7% of 8th graders can read at grade level.  Only 4% are proficient in math at this age.  The statistics are not great in almost all of our big cities.  We are told it is because we do not spend enough money on students.  In my state we spend $17,000 a year per student.  It is still not enough.  Black kids are getting the worst of it because their graduation numbers are abysmal.  Yet we are told day after day by the press and the unions how much teachers are needed, are valued, are worth every cent we pay them.  They want to be liked.  They want everyone to have a trophy.  In high school they pass you when you cannot do the work.  They get money for attendance, not results.

This government, this administration, had added more debt to the each and every one of us in the country more than all the presidents, through Reagan, combined.  I worry every day about the country we are leaving our kids.  Instead of fixing the problems, and risk not being liked, they kick the can down the road and they continue to spend money we do not have.  Obama’s cronies got a shit load of money.  His pie-eyed dreams of solar energy were a complete and utter failure, yet it made him and his followers feel good.  Obama is proud that more Americans than ever are on food stamps.  It makes him feel good, like in high school.  He is proud that more people are on disability than ever in the history of the planet, because it makes him feel good.  I do not want a man-child leading the free world or more importantly, destroying this country through his spending to make everyone feel good.

I may not be liked on Facebook but I do not care.  I may be done with it, I have not decided.  It is too much like high school and high school was filled with unimaginable douche bags who did the littlest work possible in order to be liked, or accepted, or loved.  There is no reaching for excellence, there is no pride in work well done.  Alas.

 

Less Than a Week Until the Election

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The election is less than one week from now.

I am tired of seeing the endless crap disseminated by the Democrats in their bid to win next week’s elections.  Every day on Facebook I see the latest line of attacks propagated by David Axelrod, and then the same three or four players post these little bon mots like the good little followers that they are.  The same people post the same things day in and day out for every day of this election season.  I try to refute all the bullshit being slung around but I am but one man, and the task is hard.

This election is extremely bitter and negative and it is because the Chicago thugs are in charge and they want to get the empty suit elected this election.  These scum bags resort to anything and everything…they throw 1,000 different things at the wall and they hope that some of it sticks.  It must work because the minions eagerly lap it up day after day, but seriously, enough is enough.  If you cannot win on your merits and what you have done the past few years then sling the shit like you own a shit farm.

This seems to be what drives this president in this election season.

The election is the most important in our country’s history.

I know that everyone says this every election that has ever happened in the history of our country.  But never before have we had 47% of the population contribute zero towards the federal income tax.  This election is pitting the haves against the have nots.  This president has only offered class warfare as his campaign agenda.  He has nothing else.  He is an empty suit.

This election is at a point where the 47% who pay zero in federal income taxes can vote themselves more money and suck off the government teat.  This election is the one that all great philosophers tell us happens in every democracy.  When that happens democracy fails and throughout history some type of dictator has taken over, “for the good of the country.”  When the United Stated becomes another communist country, or a socialist country, that is the end of the United States.

The poor people in this country are going to be very disappointed when this happens because whoever takes over this mess will absolutely not do a damn thing to help the poor.  This election might be our last free election, ever.  And the poor will be the ones to suffer and they will endure pain like they have never endured before.

This election is all about kissing America goodbye…..or saving her.

I have said this for over a month now and possibly for two months.  I think Romney is going to win this election and he is going to win it by a landslide.  All you have to do is look around you and you know that things are not right.  When 47 million people need food stamps in this country, something is not right.  When the real unemployment number in this country is around 20%, then something is not right.  When race relations in this country have never been worse, then something is not right.

When four people die in Libya something is not right.  When the president watched all of this happen live and in real time, and the attack took seven hours, when he watched all of this happen and did nothing, then something is not right.  When he specifically gave orders to the military who was ready to go in and save the people, when he specifically gave orders to stand down not one, not twice, but three times…then something is not right.  When two marines had to disobey orders and they saved 30 lives by leading them to safety, and then these marines died, then something is not right.  This election is all about what is not right with this country.  The Libya response is damn near treason, and that is not right.  After the attack, for two solid weeks when Obama had his flunkeys out saying all this was caused by a crappy film on the internet, when they knew for a fact that this was not the case, then something is not right.  When they continued to pile up lie after lie after lie about all of this, then something is not right.

Obama is not right.  This election is meant to set things right.  Go out and vote and if you want any semblance of the United States of America, then you must vote against Obama.  You know deep in your heart that something is not right.

Facebook and political posts

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Facebook and my political posts

I admit that I am a political animal and these days politics mean a lot to me because I think the future of our country is at stake.  Thus, I tend to post on Facebook a lot and I tend to lean way to the right on most political issues.  I do not like the Obama administration and I use Facebook to point out all the stories about this administration that do not get written about in the mainstream media.  There are a lot of stories that do not get reported.

All my friends that lean towards the Democrats tend to re-post all the crap put out by the Democratic machine.  Their messages require no thought and they put no thought into what they put on Facebook, they simply regurgitate the talking points.  I now understand how the Nazi’s took control because people are so very easy to persuade using outright distortions and lies.

I decided that I am not going to post on Facebook anymore, at least political postings.  I am going to leave them for my blog where they can go out into the universe and be digested by the masses.  It came to me today when I asked why no one in the Democratic party cares about the Obama campaign taking and asking for donations from people who do not live in this country, something which is highly illegal.  My Facebook friends would rather play Word with Friends or something like that because when I posed the question one guy said he just ignores my posts.  When my Democratic friends post something that they researched and requires thought, I always read their posts.

Facebook posts posted here.

I decided that I am going to re-post all my Facebook postings here in this article.  I will at least re-post the ones that I thought contained great thoughts and ones that were well-written.  The election is less than two weeks away and there is not much more time to get out the message.  So without much further ado, here are some of my latest and greatest posts about this election.

“So my question to my Democratic friends would be this. Do the ends justify the means? Is it OK to lie, cheat and steal to get to the ultimate goal of socialism? We make laws and the Democrats always seem to break them and there are never any repercussions. Are you telling the right we can do what we want to do and any laws and rules we make or break be damned?”

And that came with this link: http://www.nypost.com/p/news/national/bam_blind_eye_to_illegal_donors_8SWotytr1RvbhyDCRyyrEL

This post has to do with new regulations pushed through by our politicians and they have changed the amount of water a dishwasher can use.  Do you know using a dishwasher now is extremely more water-efficient that washing dishes by hand?  When they make the changes we will all have new dishwashers that do not clean well at all.

“The Democrats are at it again. They will not be happy until they control every single aspect of your life. They are controlling what size soda’s we put in our bodies in NY, and in the very near future, this is the Nostradamus part of me speaking, they will outlaw toilet paper because it causes pollution. If I were you I would start looking into getting a bidet. Or maybe we can wipe with our left hands and eat with our right like all the third world shit holes. God helps us. Why the hell would anyone with a brain want some fucking bureaucrat controlling their lives?”

And this was the link to the story: http://teapartyeconomist.com/2012/10/15/buy-this-appliance-in-2012-next-year-it-gets-regulated-to-death/

What else have I posted on Facebook?

Here are some more articles I posted on Facebook.

“This is absolutely reprehensible. Whenever education has problems meeting test scores they always lower the standards. Now they are lowering the standards on tests, effectively telling blacks and other minorities, except the Asians, that they are dumber than the other races, they are not good enough or smart enough or capable of doing well on these tests. Now we will see self-fulfilling prophecies.

This is why we need to get rid of the department of education, and then we need to give kids vouchers so they can attend any school their parents want to send them to. I bet kids who are not white or Asian would absolutely thrive and succeed beyond our wildest dreams.”
“I saw this and am really, really pissed off. Fast and Furious was one of the most ill-conceived government run operations I have ever seen in my life. It happened under Obama’s watch and Eric Holder was up to his neck in it. The ATF decided to put guns and automatic weapons in the hands of Mexican drug cartels with their brilliant thought processes thinking they could trace these guns back to the thugs and then prosecute the crimes. An ATF agent was killed by one of these guns.
Today I just read that the ATF agent that blew the whistle on these scumbag bureaucrats was fired from his job. This is one of the most obvious cases of retaliation against a man who went against our dear leader. The firing comes from the president who promised that he would have the most open and honest government of all time. The same administration who has prosecuted or fired more whistle blowers than any other administration. The same administration who holds meetings across the street from the White House so they do not have to disclose who they are talking to.

It is absolutely disgusting.

I know, this story is on the Blaze which Glenn Beck owns, but try as I might I cannot see this story on any of the main stream media outlets. This story is huge.

http://www.theblaze.com/stories/this-video-allegedly-shows-atf-whistleblower-getting-fired-in-a-dennys-parking-lot/

Next, a post about the high gas prices in California.
“What are they doing to us? The best question posed in this article about the soaring gas prices in California. I know, the president does not directly control the gas prices, but. But the president does set an agenda. So when he says he

wants to bankrupt coal companies you will wonder why it costs a fortune to heat your house this winter. While he is chasing windmills, solar panels and unicorns (to the tune of billions of dollars and then bankruptcy) then do not ask why normal energy prices go up. When he nixes plans for a new oil pipeline from Canada, and when the basically shuts down new drilling on any federal land, don’t ask why gas is going to be $5, $6 or even $8.00 a gallon; after all, that is what one person in his administration said he wanted to happen. When Obama’s administration puts in 9,000 new regulations for the EPA (basically writing laws without congress) don’t ask why we can’t build more oil refineries. He is bankrupting us through omission. When gas goes up the price of everything in your life will go up because we are a big country and all the wind from the wind farms and all the solar energy in the world will not move product across the United States. It takes gas and oil products to live and survive, even if our dear leader wishes it wasn’t so. So yes, Obama does effect the price of gas in this country and that is a reflection of the foolish policies this empty suit has put in place. So if you want to see $8.00 a gallon gas and the prices on everything you need to survive go through the roof, then by all means elect this fool, the empty suit.

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/10/06/business/energy-environment/high-gas-prices-in-california-have-drivers-scrambling.html?_r=1&

So that is a recap of the last month in my posts on Facebook. Since no one seems to pay attention to my posts anymore I really have to blog more about it here.  If Obama gets elected America is done as a country, done as a beacon to the rest of the world, and done in general.  All the news people on the left will be wondering what the hell happened and they will not see how they were accomplices to the crimes against this country.  All the professors and deep thinkers on the left will be the first ones to be shot in the head, like they did with all the intellectuals in all of the other countries that went from Democracy to socialism and communism.
Trouble is coming and it will not be pretty.  All of my friends on Facebook who do not care about politics will be wondering what the hell they did wrong and they will be begging to go back to the way it was, but it will be too late.  Fuck Facebook.

The Minnesota State Fair Part Three

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Sunday at the Minnesota State Fair

My wife and I already went to the state fair once on the Tuesday before.  It was a good day and a fun day, but we did not have the kids and they do add something to the mix.  Our son is 18 and our daughter is 15, but it seems like only yesterday that we were pushing them around in strollers or in my wife’s case, carrying one around inside of her.  When my son was three and a half, we were at the fair and he said he was hungry.  Even then my son could eat.  I took him to Peter’s wieners where you could get a hot dog for $1.00, and I bought him a hot dog.  He asked for another.  After he finished two, he asked for another.  By the time he got to hot dog number four, he petered out half way through it and said he was full.  This year, he would be paying for everything out of his own pocket.  I love the fair.

I told my wife I wanted to be on the road by 8:00 but in my head I had the time set for 8:30.  We woke up the kids and they did their morning routines, and by the time my wife was ready to leave it was 8:15 and I had a victory smile on my face!  We loaded up the car and we headed off to the Minnesota State Fair, “The Great Minnesota Get Together.”

Arriving at the State Fair.

We arrived at the state fair at close to 9:00 AM.  Traffic was light and we had to wait nary a bit to park our car.  Parking is $12 at the state fair, and there are a lot of people who park their cars there.  The day promised to be sunny and hot and we were girded with water bottles and sun screen.  When you pull into park and you open the door, the smells of the fair come rolling at you.  You smell the deep fryers and you smell the pig barns off in the near distance.  We always park next to the Midway so our ears were filled with sounds of riders riding, screams, and songs playing loudly to entice the clientele to enter the premises.  We locked the car and headed off toward Heritage Square, the entrance point to the fair if you do not want to enter at the Midway.

Heritage Square was locked tight, which was not a problem on Tuesday.  We went around and entered by the grandstand, which at the Minnesota State Fair, has been around since about 1907 (that is an educated guess).  My kids wanted to go and get a Scotch Egg for their breakfast so we headed off toward the barns and the booth that sells these wonderful concoctions.

A Scotch Egg is a hard boiled egg with a sausage that covers it and then that is breaded and the entire thing is put on a stick and deep fried.  For $7.00 each you can get one, and they are big enough to share.  We bought two of these, and I wanted one today because there was a big line and I knew that meant the goodness would be coming right out of the deep fryer.  They were fantastic.  My daughter loves them and we do too.

My kids and I then went off to the Fresh French Fry booth.  At the Minnesota State Fair there are two places that make only fries and these fries come from potatoes grown in our state.  They have a wheel there and you can spin it to win free fries.  There is always a line and they make people wait two minutes and twenty seconds between spins, so if you go you have to set aside about a half hour to get through the line.

Working the line are people they hire who have personalities.  This year they had two gals who were dressed as fairies.  The one called herself “Cherry Fairy” and she was a little cutie.  She had the gift of salesmanship and her and her partner were expert at working the crowd.  They kept the ruffians entertained and the time flew by fast.

By the time we got to the front of the line the people in line behind us grew by a lot.  We got there at the right time.  We each spun the wheel and earned nothing more than a free drink with a purchase.  We went to the line and bought a big bucket and ate the golden goodness.

The State fair begins to fill

My daughter wanted to see the Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat because her friend Josh had told her about it.  We thought it was in the crafts building so we went in there, but we were not lucky enough to find it.  We did run across Larry again, he is the man selling the wonderful peelers that we had bought on Tuesday.  I made the kids stand and watch the master but after about three minutes I sensed a rebellion, so we left.

The family then went to Giggles and my wife and kids got the Walleye cakes.  They love their fish.  They ate them with relish, the cost being $7.00 for two of them.  We then headed for the fine arts building which is one of my favorites.  In the fine arts building at the State Fair, there are many different art displays.  There are paintings and drawings, there are photographs and sculptures.  There was also an Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat in the corner.  We eyed the art, I always love the paintings of the city scenes and the photos too.

The rest of the afternoon was spent eating all the foods we did not get to earlier.  We ate deep fried pickles, onion rings, cheese curds, foot long hot dogs, corn dogs, pork chops, ice cream and other things.  It was all so very good.  We went and saw the hokiest dog show by Heritage Square and I hope I never have to watch it again.  The Wild West Dog Show at the State Fair is geared towards kids who are about five or six years old.  My kids were bored, and so was I.

We then went on the Sky Ride and my wife and I had a nice cold beer.  God, beer is so good on a hot afternoon!  My son went after a milkshake while my daughter and I had honey ice cream.  My wife was off to the wine building.  We decided that next year my wife and I would go and hot all the beer halls and wine halls.  Instead of eating our way through the fair we will drink our way through it.

We did not do Ye Old Mill or the Space Needle because my kids said they were tired.  The only ride we did that day was the Sky Ride.  Next year, I am going to bring my camera.  I love taking photos at the fair.

It ended up being a very warm day, near 95 degrees.  We bring our own water bottles so the State Fair rarely gets us for drinks, and we make sure the kids have sun screen on.  It was getting late in the afternoon and my kids were tired so we decided we were going to leave.  There is nothing longer or sadder than walking to your car after a great day at the fair.  You leave tired and happy, and part of you does not want to leave because you know it will not be coming around for another year.  By then my kids will be older and who knows if they will want to come with us or not.  The smells will be missed, the food will be missed and the people will be missed.

There were about 225,000 people that showed up at the fair on Sunday.  That was the most I had ever seen.  The lines, though, were shorter than when my wife and I came on Tuesday and there were a lot less people.  When you looked down the street in front of you, all you could see was a mass of humanity.  It is so much fun to go to the State Fair and people watch.

I can’t wait to go to the 2013 Minnesota State Fair.  I am sure the billboards are already up in Falcon Heights, MN.

sky ride 300x199 The Minnesota State Fair Part Three

The Minnesota State Fair Sky Ride

The Minnesota State Fair Part Two

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The Minnesota State Fair part two

After my wife and I had got our new peeler, we were off to watch the dog obedience classes held on the outskirts of Machinery Hill.  My wife loves animals and I love dogs.  We watched the dog show for about 45 minutes as the dogs and their owners showed us what it was like to own a dog that actually listens to them.  The dogs were amazing, well-trained and they seemed to loved getting love from all the people watching the show.  By the time it was over I was stiff and sore and I felt like the Tin Man in “The Wizard of Oz” needing my oil can.

My wife was then off in search of her walleye roll.  Walleye is the fish all people in Minnesota go for, except for me, but that is only because I do not like fish.  The walleye you get from any restaurant in Minnesota, including the state fair, is actually from Canada, because we cannot sell our fish from our own lakes here in this state.  The walleye is a fish that does not have a fishy taste.  At least the taste is so subtle you may think you are eating only the whisper of a fish.  The walleye roll at Giggles, (yes that is the name) came on a fantastic piece of Texas toast and it looked appealing.  I ordered fries because they were only $2.50 when you ordered a sandwich.  The fries were cold and bad and I threw them away after eating only one.

I did have a Grain Belt.  Ah, Grain Belt.  This beer has been a staple in Minnesota ever since I was a wee lad and would watch my grandpa drink that, or most likely a Hamm’s.  My grandpa always added a little salt to his beer and it would become angry and foamy, and supposedly it added to the taste.  I, however, am a purist and I downed my ice-cold beer with relish.  It was absolutely delicious.

The State Fair Staple

My state fair staple is the foot long hot dog.  I had one on Tuesday and the price this year is the same as last year, $5.00.  The About a Foot Long hot dog stands have been in existence at the state fair since I was a kid and they have not changed one bit.  You get a wonderfully boiled hot dog on a nice fresh bun, and I always get mine smothered in fried onions.  I am proud to say that my daughter, who was never an onion fan having the sophisticated palate of a child, now loves the foot long hot dog smothered in onions.

My wife and I were pretty worn out by this time of the day and we considered going home.  We knew we would be back the following Sunday with the kids and we would be there most of the day.  We went and picked up some salt water taffy and then we made one more loop around the State Fair grounds and looked at all the people.  It was a good day, it was sunny and warm and we were spent.

Leaving the State Fair

The longest walk of all is the walk to your car at the end of the day at the state fair.  The parking lot seems forever and a day away, and even though you are tired you do not really want to leave.  It is hard saying goodbye, even though you know you are coming back in a few days.  You are tired and worn out and just want to sit in some air conditioning.  Your belly is full and your senses sated.  It was a good day but not as much fun as when you have the kids.  That is the subject of my next post.

Until then…TTFN

The Minnesota State Fair

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The Minnesota State Fair was our plan for the day

The Minnesota State Fair starts every year ten days before Labor Day (which is always a Thursday) and it ends on Labor Day.  It takes place in Falcon Heights, MN, which is next to Saint Paul but a stones throw from Minneapolis.  It has been located on this site for my entire lifetime and I believe it has been at its present location since 1885.  My grandpa and grandma lived only a few miles from the fair in Lauderdale.  I have been to every state fair since I was four or five years old, except for the two years I lived in Las Vegas.  I love the state fair.

Now that I am married with kids our family has made a tradition of going to the fair every year as well.  My wife and I also go there alone so we can do the “old people” things that our kids do not like to do.  That means we go into a lot of buildings, we watch a lot of demonstrations for the newest product that will change our lives, and we look for the rabbits.  My wife has a thing for rabbits.

My wife and I went to the state fair today and had a blast.  The weather was hot, it was close to 90 when we left, but we did not feel oppressed by the heat.  The morning was overcast and there were not a lot of people there yet.  As the day wore on the weather got warmer, the state fair got busier, and the human wave was seen down every street one looked.

The state fair and our traditions

My wife and I know a secret way into the fair that involves almost no traffic and very little headache.  We approach the state fair like we are on military maneuvers, planning our way in, where we will park, and what we will do during the day.  We pick a weekday to go by ourselves, sans kids, and we hope like hell it does not rain.  We eat a small breakfast at home and then leave a little after rush hour so we avoid traffic.  We are a well oiled machine.

We arrived using our route, and no I will NOT tell you how to get in with minimal fuss, and parked in the state fair lot.  We paid $11.00 to park our car this year and $9.00 to get in the state fair.  The $9.00 was discounted because we bought our tickets ahead of time at a local grocery store.  We applied sun screen and entered, our senses filled with the smells, sights and sounds of the state fair.  It is like no other feeling.

As an aside, if you want to get a feel for the Minnesota State Fair read the excellent short story, “A Night at the Fair” by F. Scott Fitzgerald.  A version of it can be found here.  This story was written in 1928 and it still manages to catch the feeling of our State Fair.  So many things are the same, the candy, the pop, the penny arcade, and Ye Olde Mill.

We entered and went into the Grandstand to search for a new product that my mom, who is 72 this year and also goes to the fair every year, had told me about earlier in the week.  They were some kind of device that was used instead of a chip clip.  You can buy almost anything at the Minnesota State Fair.  We wandered up and down the crowded aisles and we found the things.  They were impressive, easy to use and they sealed the bags air tight.  They were simple and easy to use and came with a lifetime guarantee.  We bought a pack for $22 (“We pay the tax!”) and were on our way.  We passed the personality computers that were there when I was a kid and they looked as archaic today as they did back then.  You could hear the dot-matrix printers working overtime kicking out the personality pieces of paper.

The State Fair and Food.

We next went off in our search for our first bit of food.  This is a very important process and when you are looking at 9:00 in the morning, your options are limited.  The state fair has a lot of different foods and your options are limitless, except for breakfast, where there are only a thousand different places to eat.  This year we opted for the Scotch Egg, which is a hard boiled egg, wrapped in a savory sausage mix, and then all of that is breaded and deep fried to golden perfection.  The brilliant thing about eating here first is that the stand is located next to the barns, and we were going to go in and see the animals before the temperatures got into the 80′s and the smell of animals, hay and people would overwhelm us.

We feasted on our eggs, my wife does not like to share, and paid our $7.00 each for the privilege of eating something that my cholesterol doctor would surely hate.  I didn’t see him milling about so I ate my egg with relish.  OK, it was a horseradish sauce, but I ate it up like a starving man.

My wife wanted to go off in search of the bunnies.  At the state fair there are six or seven animal barns and some are dedicate to horses, some to cows, the pigs have their own place at the Swine Barn, and then the bunny rabbits are regulated to the poultry barn, off in a corner of the building, and only during the first few days of the state fair.  Unfortunately we were a day late, at least, and there was nary a bunny to be found.  We found hens and roosters, ducks, turkeys and other assorted water foul, but there were no bunnies.  We left the poultry barn and went off to see more fabulous items for sale.

There is, deep within the Education building, an old crooked man who is one of the greatest salesmen I have ever witnessed.  We go to see him every year, hoping that he is still around and hoping that we can listen to his spiel.  He sells Swiss made peelers, and we have owned one for about 15 years.  They are fabulous.  Our old one finally succumbed to old-age and wear and tear, and we wanted to see if he would honor the lifetime guarantee that comes on his product.  I can’t tell you how happy I was when I turned the corner and saw a head of white hair and I heard his distinctive patter.

At the Minnesota State Fair I have never seen a better salesman.  He was in the middle of his demo and we watched him slice apple, potatoes, cabbage and zucchini.  He flirted with the women, told stories about his mother, teased the men.  He asked who had bought from him in the past and about seven hands went up.  People come back to watch him because he is that good!  Anyway, we waited until his patter was over and my wife asked my to buy a new set of peelers (which is truly the best peeler I have ever owned), slicers, Julianners, and knives available all for the incredible low price of $20.  She wanted me to buy one because she likes the old guy and she wanted him to have more sales.  God, I love my wife.

I bought my wares and she waited until he was done selling the ten or so sets he sold for that session.  She asked about an exchange and he gave her one with no questions asked, and commented on the state of our device.  It did look bad!  A stranger came up and asked my wife about the peeler and we stood and talked to her for three or four minutes and my wife convinced her to watch the pitch and to buy his product!  She should get commissions!

Anyway, that is part one of my story about the Minnesota State Fair.  I will complete my story in the next day or two, but I was full of piss and vinegar about it sitting here tonight.

 

I am back

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I am back with a vengeance!

Hello Lovelies, it has been a while since we last chatted.  I am sure I have been missed and for that I am sorry but life has gotten in the way of my blogging.  I hate it when that happens.  I will go into detail a little bit, but the overall message I want to convey is that I am back.

Where have I been?  You know how life piles up around you and you get to busy to pull your head out of your ass?  That is where I have been.  My kids are getting older which means that I am taking on a lot more items that I did not have to deal with in my past.  My son starts college next year and my daughter is still in high school.  College involves filling out a lot of forms, begging for money, and searching online for used text books.  Thank God for Amazon where I saved about $200 on text books.

My son had a graduation party and that is part of the reason it took me so long to say, “I am back.”  We cleaned the hell out of the house, invited everyone we know, we cooked brisket, we bought a ton of drinks, and we had a nice little party.  It was very hot out that day but a lot of people showed up, a lot gave money as gifts and it is going to put a dent in the first year of expenses for his school.  He already bought a new laptop for himself that runs like a raped ape.

My son also has his first job and he starts tomorrow.  I am back because he will be out of the house working his little butt off.  He will earn money for school and rock it out.

I am back, and my daughter is getting old.

I say this because she is 15 going on 40.  He got her permit to drive and now I am out with her every day on the road teaching her the skills she will need to pass the drivers test.  She is a good driver.  She is relentless when asking if she can go out for a drive every day.  Every day we do it and every day it shuts her up.  When you are driving an hour every day it tends to make you less able to do other things, like blog.  But I am back.

I am back to the diet which is a good thing because I am heavier than ever.  I need to get my fat ass out of the house and back to running.  When I left the house yesterday to run, or should I say gasp, my dog whined and cried until I came back.  Who knew the old girl loved me?

I am back.

I am back to not getting laid, being relatively happy in my life, and ready to blog again.  This one is short to get me back in the mood, but I am back.  I will discuss purchases made, recommendations, sex, and of course everything else that is going on in my life.  I am back!

 

A little license plate problem

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My license plate problem

This past Monday I had to go to the Department of Motor Vehicles to renew my tabs for my car.  At the same time I decided I would replace my brake light that had gone out a week or so previous.  I was going to kill two birds with one stone and figured I had a 20 minute job on my hands.  Alas.

I went to the DMV and waited a very short time before my number was called.  I did not notice on my renewal form, but I needed new license plates because mine were of a certain age.  A few years ago 3M made a back door deal with the state of Minnesota where they would provide brand new license plates, with 3M coating on them of course, to the state in order that law enforcement officials needed to see the plates at night, even though this was never a problem.  I thought to myself that it was a nice day, no worries, and I upped my estimated time to 30 minutes.  I then went to the auto parts store and got a new license plate holder for the plate in front, because my old one had cracked and broke into pieces, and I also picked up the brake light bulbs I needed to replace.  Life was good.

The first problem with the license plate

I got home and set about my tasks.  I went to the rear of my car and attempted to unscrew the old plate.  The old screws were made of plastic and I immediately snapped off the heads of both screws.  I trudged to my basement, muttering under my breath, and brought up my tool box and tried to remove the remaining part of the screw with a pliers.  No luck, the screws were both too short to grab.  I trudged down to my basement to retrieve my drill and I attempted to drill out the screws that were left in my rear plate.  I could not get a good grip on them and was unsuccessful in my endeavors.

Not being a man who is easily intimidated by such little interruptions, I went to the front of the car and replaced the license plate with no problems whatsoever.  I then attempted to tackle the jog of replacing my brake lights.  I opened the trunk and it was full of crap and debris that had accumulated over the years, so I went and got a trash bag and cleaned out my trunk.  I also got the wet/dry vac out and did the job correctly before I replaced my bulbs.  After Act I was completed, I removed the panels that lined the trunk and replaced the bad bulb first.  No worries, it was a simple job.

If I am going to replace one bulb I always replace both bulbs because the other one will most likely go soon as well.  I went to the other light and I tried to remove the bulb but the plastic piece would not come out of the brake light assembly.  I tired for about five minutes and had no luck.  However, when I was trying to get the socket out of the brake light assembly I did loosen the bulb and it dropped into the brake light assembly piece.  Alas.  I then had to unbolt the entire brake light assembly and I tried for about five more minutes to remove the socket from the assembly with no luck.  I ended up using a screwdriver to pry the socket lose, it broke a little plastic, but I was able to remove it from the rest of the brake light assembly.  I then spent five more minutes digging out the bulb that was tumbling inside the light assembly.  Once that was completed I put the new bulb in and bolted the assembly to the car and I replaced all of the panels I needed to remove to change the one bad brake light.

The final license plate problem and the final solution

My next task was to go online and figure out how to remove the screws that broke off in the rear license plate.  I was told I needed a special bit so I went off to the automotive store and I got the correct bit and I also bought new blots to replace the cheap plastic ones that snapped off.  I got in my car and read the back of the package on the drill bit and it suggested using another type of bit, a left-handed bit, to draw the old screws out.  I then headed off to Menard’s and I bought yet another drill bit as well as a different size of the first bit I bought.  I wanted to cover all my bases.

I got home, went to work and promptly removed the plastic bolts.  I took out my new plate and put them in place and tried the new bolts but they were too bit.  I then went into my basement again to look for different sized bolts to try and fit in the plate.  I had one bolt that kind of fit but I knew it would no hold up for any good length of time.  I then drove off to Menard’s with my tool kit and purchased two different sized bolts and proceeded to put the bolts on in the parking lot, to ensure I did not have to make another trip.  I looked at my watch and it was 4:30 in the afternoon.

My 20 minute job took me seven hours.  Good thing I buffered in an extra ten minutes in my first estimate!